31 May 2005

Oliver Stoned

Oliver Stone has been arrested over the weekend for DUI and possessing an illegal substance. He's now out on bail.

They are not disclosing what the illegal substance is until test results are back.

But then again, judging by the sheer abomination that was "Alexander", I would probably be totally smacked up 24/7 if I was him.


Some people say that "a picture says a thousand words".

Well this picture says three words... "YOU STUPID BINT"

Courtney Love is a Beast

What's going on here? Okay, so I know she's pregnant. But surely the unborn baby isn't the size of a 17 stone man?

She's MASSIVE!!!

I prefer her in the good 'ole days when she just looked like a freak....

30 May 2005

Darius is an Exhibitionist

Posted by Hello

Darius, you should not be serenading to young girls with the traditional kilt underwear...

Plus as you can see you don't have much to be showing off.

If I were you I'd put on some stylish Calvin Klein's and stuff a large pair of socks, actually better make that a bolster pillow, down there and try and pass off as a real man.

27 May 2005

Arnold Schwarzenegger can't speak English

Arnold Schwarzenegger publicly apologized for his statement that California should "close the borders" with Mexico to control illegal immigration.

Schwarzenegger said about his comment "I meant 'securing' our borders, not 'closing' them."

Whoopsee-daisy Arnie! Slight difference between securing and closing a border!!

Maybe it's time to go back to pamping iyan and ruining movies with your terrible acting.

Teen F*cks Puppy

Yes this lovely specimen of a 17-year old boy has been caught sh*gging a 6 month old puppy.

And if that's not enough to make his parents bowl over with pride, in 2004 he was charged with sexual assault against a 4 year old girl and a 13 year old girl - the lowest of the low.

If you look really hard into his eyes you can tell that he's thinking of f*cking you.

26 May 2005

P Diddy gets raped in court

Diddy - surprised

P Diddy has just been taken to court, and quite frankly been raped.

He's been ordered to pay $US21,782 a month in child support (for one child). Ontop of that he already pays health insurance, tuition, vacations and clothes at US$120,000 a year.

What kind of an 11-year old kid needs so much money? The kid must be so bling bling he can't even get off his gold encrusted sofa.

Hungry Old Bag

An 86 year old woman was waiting for her pizza to be delivered.

It was taking longer than expected so she called 911 emergency 20 times in 38 minutes!!!! (This story is from BBC so must be true!)

This woman must have been so damn hungry! Even calling 911 once would be an over-reaction but calling 20 times?!?!

And if that's not enough, when police came to take her away she "kicked and bit the hand of the officer who did not feed her".... what an animal!

Oh Dear!

Okay, so I should be sticking up for women drivers since I'm a chick.

But there's one exception which brings down the whole race of women around the world.

The worst thing is this gal doesn't even realise that she's just so wrong.
Posted by Hello

I rest my case.

25 May 2005

Billy Zane Running for President

AWESOME! Could you imagine Billy Zane as the most powerful man in the world?

Actually, maybe not so great, I'm still so scared of Zane from the movie Dead Calm, if he became President he might use all his power to buy sailing boats and kill people.

Or maybe he'll follow the Titanic plot and become a psycho on a cruise liner.

What's going on? This guy spends his life killing people on boats, no doubt the American people (who have a taste for murder) will see that as endearing and vote for him.

Tom Cruise Takes it Too Far

Wow, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have taken their whole publicity stunt so far that he's gone and gotten her pregnant for a headline....

How weird is this, he's so much older than her but due to his size he looks like her son.

Tom - in a box

24 May 2005

Michael Jackson is Innocent

ok, so maybe he isn't innocent but by the looks of the latest evidence he's probably just a poor little rich weirdo who likes sleeping with children but not with children....

I mean look what he's done to his face. He can't possibly be completely sane if he would prefer to look like a freaky doll from my nightmares than a normal guy.

who knows.... the saga continues... one thing's for sure though... the freak can dance.